Thank you very much for the kind words Alex! I know a lot of times parents have to wear both hats, but still try to give the “dad perspective” as you mentioned too. 😊
The 5:47 fridge stare is such a specific detail, and it’s making me think about how much of Round 2 is decision fatigue disguised as chores. The task itself takes 90 seconds like you said, it’s the deciding that eats you alive.
I remember my dad, an accountant, would come home from his office job and sit in “his” living room chair and read the newspaper (no phone through which to scroll back then), while Mom fixed dinner and we kids worked on homework or played. That seemed to be his “shift” — reading, instead of number-crunching. To be honest, and regretfully so, I’m not recalling what Mom’s “shift” was, as a person who didn’t work outside of the home. There certainly was evidence she worked hard at home all her waking hours. I can only surmise what she did when she “shifted” between her “day job” and when the family started coming through the door with “demands” and expectations. Perhaps she didn’t allow herself a “shift”.
For me (although now retired), working a full-time job with many days flowing into overtime (before and after becoming a parent), I recall having the advantage of a half hour drive home from the office on quiet rural roads, listening to music on the car radio. That was my “shift” that pleasantly, and effectively, seemingly separated the chaos of the work day from my work-at-home evening.
Now, as a retiree, I still have many day and evening tasks and projects to complete. I just now have the advantage of not requiring the once-needed shift as in the past…or…am I simply fooling myself and denying the need?
This really captures something many people experience but rarely put into words. Thank you for naming the invisible work that often goes unnoticed. I hope more people give themselves grace instead of measuring themselves only by what gets checked off the list.
Really enjoyed reading the dad perspective on this 🙌
Thank you very much for the kind words Alex! I know a lot of times parents have to wear both hats, but still try to give the “dad perspective” as you mentioned too. 😊
The 5:47 fridge stare is such a specific detail, and it’s making me think about how much of Round 2 is decision fatigue disguised as chores. The task itself takes 90 seconds like you said, it’s the deciding that eats you alive.
I remember my dad, an accountant, would come home from his office job and sit in “his” living room chair and read the newspaper (no phone through which to scroll back then), while Mom fixed dinner and we kids worked on homework or played. That seemed to be his “shift” — reading, instead of number-crunching. To be honest, and regretfully so, I’m not recalling what Mom’s “shift” was, as a person who didn’t work outside of the home. There certainly was evidence she worked hard at home all her waking hours. I can only surmise what she did when she “shifted” between her “day job” and when the family started coming through the door with “demands” and expectations. Perhaps she didn’t allow herself a “shift”.
For me (although now retired), working a full-time job with many days flowing into overtime (before and after becoming a parent), I recall having the advantage of a half hour drive home from the office on quiet rural roads, listening to music on the car radio. That was my “shift” that pleasantly, and effectively, seemingly separated the chaos of the work day from my work-at-home evening.
Now, as a retiree, I still have many day and evening tasks and projects to complete. I just now have the advantage of not requiring the once-needed shift as in the past…or…am I simply fooling myself and denying the need?
This really captures something many people experience but rarely put into words. Thank you for naming the invisible work that often goes unnoticed. I hope more people give themselves grace instead of measuring themselves only by what gets checked off the list.